Honestly, I’m torn on which way to go with this one. On the one hand, I’ve been training for the Army Ten Miler since May so that I don’t make a fool of myself; again. On the other hand, I’m ready to move to Jamaica under a false identity and hope that the kids never find me! Which way to go, which way to go…Hmmm, Jamaica here I come.
Anyone who doesn’t believe that God knows what he’s doing and man does not needs to set up an observation post somewhere in my neighborhood and keep an eye on my family. God designed men to be hunter/gatherers and women to be caregivers. Earliest man understood this. The first cave dwelling neanderthal men went off to the office to trade saber-tooth tiger tusks and send e-mammoths while the women stayed back at the cave and let the kids watch Barney the dinosaur, sew fig leaf outfits, and have supper on the table when her man pulled up in his Yabba Dabba Doo mobile. In the Middle-Ages, it was much the same. Every once in a while a really strong woman would rise up from the crowd and exercise her natural leadership abilities over armies of men but for the most part, men took care of beating each other up and killing animals and women healed the men and cooked said killed animals.
But was that system good enough for me? Nooooooooo! I had to let my wife go off to Pakistan and be the warrior while I stayed home and tried to perform the caregiver role while partially filling the hunter/gatherer role as well. I bet up in heaven there’s a TV station that carries a program called “Pat TV; All Patrick, All the Time” (yes June, a Matthew McConaughey reference). I bet the angels sit there and watch that program and laugh, laugh, laugh, laugh, laugh. “Watch him try to make it to the soccer game and still get supper on the table…”; “Bet he forgets that load of laundry in the washer again, you watch”; “I don’t think he’s going to make it too much longer with all of his mind intact”. Yep, their having a good old time. I bet their drawing straws now going, “Lord, please don’t let me get the short one. I don’t want to have to go down there and straighten that mess out.”
Personally, I hope they finish drawing straws pretty soon. I COULD USE SOME HELP DOWN HERE, DON’T YA KNOW!
ahh, you men. You make this job that we women have look so hard when really all you need is a beer at 3pm and a lock on the bathroom door.